


Agent White and the Seven Spies

by elle_you_oh, itsamagicalplace



Series: A Modern Retelling [1]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, F/M, Fairy Tale Retellings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-17
Updated: 2014-12-17
Packaged: 2018-03-01 16:53:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2780651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elle_you_oh/pseuds/elle_you_oh, https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsamagicalplace/pseuds/itsamagicalplace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>To protect Phil after he exposes Garrett’s plans, Fury sends him to live amongst seven other spies who are hiding in a cottage in the woods. Or the one where they’re only allowed to refer to one another by their dwarf names.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Agent White and the Seven Spies

When Phil finds himself face to arrow with Clint Barton, he knows he’s well and truly screwed.

Maria had warned him again and again about meddling with Garrett’s plans, that it was dangerous; telling him it was a bad idea.

But he had joined SHIELD for a reason, to protect civilians, and he had been trained for this.

He had discovered what Garrett was hiding, weapons of mass destruction and now knew why Maria had told him to be cautious.

Garrett was insane.  

As Phil slipped away after loading what he could onto a thumb drive, he’d seen Garrett carving into a wall chanting;  


_Writing, writing, on the wall_   
_Show me how to kill them all._  


Phil had barely gotten out in time, broadcasting the news to his fellow agents, but apparently Garrett had this big red button that was labelled ‘Press in case you are discovered and need to get rid of SHIELD,’ and he had used it.

All agents loyal to Garrett had been activated, and Phil had climbed to number one on Garrett’s hit list for what he had done.

Phil’s slowly backing away from Clint now, but he’s been cornered, and he takes one last breath and closes his eyes, preparing for an arrow to pierce his heart at any time.

He hears a loud ‘whoosh’ sound and glass breaking, the sound of an arrow reaching its target echoing through the nearly empty room.

When he opens his eyes again, Clint’s bow is unstrung, hanging over his shoulder and all the security cameras have been smashed.

"In exactly thirty seconds Fury will be outside the second window to the right. He’s taking you somewhere safe until all this blows over. Stay alive, and I’ll see you on the other side."

Phil can only nod as he watches one of his oldest friends leave the safety of the room and enter the chaotic battle that is raging on outside.

He's mentally kicking himself for even considering that Clint would have turned against them. 

He's pulled from his thoughts when he hears a loud crashing sound, and Natasha’s busted through the window, shards of glass flying everywhere. 

"Phil. Go. NOW."

He was sure she was somewhere in France just yesterday, away from the danger that lies here. But she’s back, and Phil knows that she and Clint have each other’s backs and he’s a little more relieved.

"See you on the other side," he says to her, repeating Clint’s words from earlier as he climbs onto the window ledge.

Fury’s right outside, sitting in the driver’s seat of Lola. He carefully bridges the gap between the edge of the window and the car, wary of the thirty floor drop that would await him if he were to misstep.

There’s a duffel in the back seat, and as soon as Phil straps himself in to the passenger’s seat, they’re off and for the first time in his life, he’s scared about what the future holds.

* * *

 

They’ve parked outside a cottage in the woods, and even in these circumstances, Phil can’t help but roll his eyes at Fury’s cliché choice of a safe house.

He’d been briefed on the flight over.

The house he would be staying at already had seven other occupants, and for their own protection, they would only refer to one another by their assigned code names.

"Agent White? You have got to be kidding me," Phil tries to argue, but Fury always gets what Fury wants.

He would not be allowed to leave the cottage, but the others had been here for longer and had their own tasks, collecting supplies and doing perimeter checks.

Fury taps at the door in a seemingly random pattern, and a voice from inside calls out to them.

"Over the seven jewelled hills, beyond the seventh fall."

It’s a woman’s voice, and she has an accent, British if Phil has heard correctly. But he can’t be sure, because it’s all a little fuzzy and the door has drowned out some of the sound.

"In the cottage of the Seven Dwarfs, dwells Snow White, the fairest of them all," Fury responds, and the door clicks open revealing a young woman in a sweater vest and an equally young man in matching garb.

"Oh hello sir," she chirps brightly, and yes, that is an unmistakably British accent.

"This is Agent White," Fury says as he gestures to Phil; "You two know how to take it from here."

And with that, the one eyed man is off, and Phil feels a pang of sadness as Nick Fury flies off with his precious car.

"Hi, I’m Agent Doc and this is Agent Bashful."

Phil has turned back to the pair in the doorway, and the girl is smiling at him and the boy is blushing profusely.

They quickly usher him inside, bolting shut the door behind them, and Phil can hear several locks sliding into place.

She’s leading him down the corridor, chattering away about different rules and regulations and the protocols to follow in certain situations, and her companion interjects from time to time in his Scottish accent to fill in her gaps.

It’s nice of them to be so detailed, but Phil’s been in a safe house before and he’s well aware of how he has to conduct himself.

They turn a corner into what he can only assume is a lounge room and there are three other people inside, sitting around.

The British girl, Agent Doc, is introducing each of his new house mates to him, and he’s internally cursing himself for getting into this situation in the first place.

The African American man sitting in the arm chair closest to them is Agent Happy, and Phil wonders if Fury picked the name because of the constant slightly unsettling grin on the man’s face. In the same fashion, he suspects the stoic young man in the suit was named Agent Grumpy for the frown that appeared to be permanently etched into his expression.  

But then again, the other young girl who is all smiles doesn’t appear at all to reflect her code name of Agent Dopey.

These kids seem sweet enough, and Phil thinks he can live with this, for a while at least.

Phil meets his two other new companions over dinner later that day, a tall blonde woman by the name of Agent Sleepy and another Brit, a middle aged man dubbed Agent Sleazy by his fellow companions.

He discovers none of them are particularly gifted in the kitchen, and agrees to take over food preparation duties from now on.

When he retreats to his new room that evening, it’s the first time he’s had the opportunity to sit and think in the quiet since before this whole incident had occurred.

He knows that together Natasha and Clint are virtually unstoppable, so he’s not too anxious about their chances. And he’s sure Maria can handle herself.

He is however, concerned about Melinda.

He knows it’s silly to worry, but the last time he had seen her was down on the administrative floors and she hadn’t been out in the field for years.

He falls asleep with her on his mind and nightmares haunt his slumber.

* * *

 

It's been several weeks since his elaborate escape, and he’s settling into the lifestyle that he’s begun here. His seven house mates have warmed up to him, even Agent Grumpy who doesn’t seem to like anybody.

The seven of them have taken turns staying with him at the cottage, doing their part in helping him adjust, and he’s grateful for it, truly. But he’s also glad they’re all out today. Agent Dopey who he’s learnt is brilliant with computers has dragged Agent Grumpy out into town to scavenge for better hardware. Agent Happy, who still continues to wear bright grin on his face each day is out restocking their food supplies.

The rest of them are down in a hidden underground laboratory, somewhere in the forest, where Agent Doc is checking on her bacterium. Fury had made sure their work and contribution to the agency would not suffer even though they had to live under fake identities.

Truth be told he misses his job and the way he lived life before, but it’s not so bad like this. He’s a little more relaxed with a houseful of people looking out for him, and he’s let his guard down.

Just a little.

But sometimes, that’s all it takes.

* * *

 

When Nick Fury returns to his home in the evening he does not anticipate what or who is waiting for him on his couch.

"Agent May, what a surprise. Would you like a drink?"

She stands up as he speaks, arms crossing protectively over her chest as she frowns at him.

"Where’s Coulson?"

"That’s classified."

He can feel her rolling her eyes at him without even looking.

"You know the rules Agent May."

"Garrett’s escaped. He’s taken the APA formula with him. I’ve saved what little I could of the anti-serum."

"Now why didn’t you just lead with that?"

* * *

 

Phil’s cleaning up the remains from breakfast when it happens.

He realises just a split second too late as he’s stabbed in the neck with a syringe, and the last things he’s aware of before he blacks out are the familiar voices of his house mates and the face of John Garrett swimming above him.

Agent Sleepy had noticed the perimeter breach first, and she’d immediately contacted the others as they all raced back to the cottage, arriving just a moment too late. She and Agent Grumpy take the mad man out, whilst Agent Doc hurries over, frazzled, to his unmoving body.

"Agent White, Agent White, can you hear me?"

She pulls the syringe from where it is still sticking out of him, running her fingers over his neck, trying desperately to find a pulse.

It’s there, but it’s fading with each minute that passes.

Agent Doc begins to cry softly, and Agent Dopey does too. Agents Grumpy and Happy have chained Garrett up in the corner of the room, and they’re all crowded around their newest compatriot as his breathing becomes more and more shallow.

He’s almost completely silent and they’re all in tears, even Agent Grumpy when the door slams open and a woman rushes in, followed by a man who they all recognise as Director Fury.

She freezes when she sees Phil lying there, and Fury’s gestured for them all to move away from him to allow them some space.

In seconds she has his head cradled in her lap as she softly caresses his cheek with one hand.

"Phil, you can’t die on me like this," she murmurs softly, but the entire room has heard it.

The man lying there, slowly drifting closer to death is Phil Coulson.

The Phil Coulson.

The agent who had exposed Garrett’s schemes and now they realise why he’d been targeted.

The same man who’d once been partnered up with the legendary Melinda May who was rumoured to have taken down an entire army with no back up.

This must be her.

Fury’s shoved a box filled with medical supplies into the arms of Agent Doc who is still quietly sobbing as she opens it. Even in their current state, she and Agent Bashful manage to load up the syringe labelled TLK320, but her hands are trembling, and she shakes her head.

"I can’t do it."

The rest of the agents are standing back; Agent Dopey is crying in the arms of Agent Grumpy, who appears to have shed a tear or two himself.

The Director takes the syringe from her hands and walks over to Phil’s body handing it to Melinda May who without missing a beat plunges it into the other side of his neck, depressing the contents into his bloodstream.

Removing the needle, she discards of it haphazardly to the side, as she runs her fingers through his hair and presses a soft kiss to his brow.

They don’t know how much time has passed, but they’re all just silent, sitting there, waiting for something, anything to happen.

Maybe it’s too late.

But then she feels his heart rate gradually increasing, and he begins to breathe properly again. His head stirs in her lap, and he opens his eyes to the most wondrous sight.

It’s Melinda, and she looks like she might have been crying, but now she’s smiling and her hair is tickling his face and he wrinkles his nose a little at that.

"You saved my life," he manages to croak out quietly, and she just smiles a little more and shakes her head.

And as much as he doesn’t want to take his eyes off her, he looks around the room and sees his newest companions, all smiling with tear streaked faces.

She helps him sit up despite protests from the others that he should rest, and he’s leaning heavily against her side but she doesn’t seem to mind.

He learns that everyone else is safe and they’ve taken Garrett’s operations down.

He wonders if he can convince Fury to let him take another couple weeks off for a nice long vacation. Technically hiding away in a safe house didn’t count, and he wants to take Melinda somewhere nice where it’ll just be the two of them.  

She’s supporting him with one arm, and the other agents are all expressing how glad they are he’s alive, and Nick Fury’s standing over in the corner poking Garrett with a stick.

All’s right with the world; he’ll ask Fury later.

For now he’s content to sit in the arms of the woman he loves the more than anything in the world, surrounded by his new found family.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next week on 'A Modern Retelling':
> 
> Phil's Fury Godmother
> 
> Phil and his lab rats are in danger of being fired when their research comes to a halt due to lack of funding. Their last chance comes in the form of Nick Fury, who takes Phil to the annual Stark gala to help him find investors for their products.


End file.
